Love Notes

Want to feel better? Do a small act of kindness


Kindness is good for you. If you want to know why, and get some ideas for small, kind, acts that help you feel better, watch this…

Kindness is powerful for others too. Here are 2 of my favorite videos about kindness. They make me cry and feel good about humanity, every time…

If you like this Love Note, share it with someone.

I would love to hear about small acts of kindness you do that make you feel good. You can reach me at

Read more…

Self-love Takes Courage


This past week was rugged for me.  I had a major disappointment and a part of myself I haven’t yet learned to completely love was alive and kicking.

I was reflecting on the dynamic that when we take actions to stretch our comfort zone, and it doesn’t work out as planned (or even when it does) we can get some pretty wicked backlash.

When we choose to love ourselves more, and allow more of our-self to come more alive, the old fears and lessons we learned WILL come up to be loved.

This is why se…

Read more…

How Food Affects Your Brain



One of the health practitioners I most trust to help my clients with their anxiety and depression is Kristen Allott, ND.

I have known Dr Allott, followed her work, and sent clients to her almost since I began my practice 15 years ago.  I regularly use her suggestions to help my clients change their eating to reduce their anxiety.

Now she and Natasha Duarte have written a book so they knowledge she gives to her clients is available to anyone!  Yay!

Fuel Your Brain, Not Your Anxiety:  S…

Read more…

Do You Love a Narcissist? Help is Here


If you love someone who has narcissist or borderline personality disorder, READ THIS BOOK.

Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist: How to End the Drama and Get on with Life, by Margalis Fjelstad.
This book has helped change the lives of several of my clients, literally. The photo is of my own very well worn copy.

Common Feelings of a Caretaker

  • You are stressed much of the time
  • You live with two different people, one who is loving and attentive, and one who is…

Read more…

Your Words Matter: How to Talk to Yourself in a Way That Makes You Feel Better


I’ve been walking around lately saying “I’ve got this!”

I’ve been saying this partly because I’m in the midst of creating a new program and I always get scared when I do something new. I’ve also been saying it because winter is coming and I’m a little worried about how I’ll handle the pandemic without the sun. The winter days are dark and short here in Seattle.

But mostly I’m saying it because it feels good, and it helps me feel more motivated to tackle what I’m facing.

The longer I’m on this…

Read more…

Social Media and Your Body


Please watch The Social Dilemma. It will show you why we spend so much time on social media, what it is doing to our thinking, and the resulting social divide.

On a personal note, it helped partially explain to me why my brother-in-law and I, both good people, see the world so differently.

The reason I’m writing this Love Note though, is because the real take-away The Social Dilemma reminded me of, is the importance of learning to trust ourselves instead of our newsfeed.

Part of getting my Ph…

Read more…

“No” is a Complete Sentence


It’s a grey Seattle morning.  I’m drinking coffee and reading “Detox Your Life” by my friend and colleague Rebecca Gould.  I highly recommend you get it.

I can barely sit still because I am reading her section on saying “no.”  I LOVE it!

As a child I learned that “no” was not an ok response.  Around the age of 50, I decided to declare “my year of the bitch.”  I told everyone to expect me to act more bitchy that year.  In reality, I was just going to practice saying no, but that doesn’t have th…

Read more…

How a Sentence Changed my Life & an awesome podcast!


I’m proud to share that I got a piece published in Thrive Global! Arianna Huffington’s new venture. I talk about a pretty dark period in my life, but it ends well. ♥

“It was a sunny fall afternoon in 1996. On this particular day I was sitting on my bed reading a self-help book.

And I was thinking of killing myself…” Read more at Thrive Global

Also, my interview on Lisa Zawrotny’s Positively Living Podcast is up! Lisa and I are kindred spirits. In it you will hear my story about how I made …

Read more…

Want to make your New Year’s Resolution last more than a week?


Welcome to the season of goal setting and self-flagellation!

I stopped setting New Year goals years ago, because I always started off the year feeling like a failure.  I am not alone.

Research has shown that less than 25% of people are still keeping their goals by the end of January.  Worse, only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.

Nevertheless, we are still driven to set big goals, create vision boards, buy gym shoes, and hope for huge changes–because of a day on the calendar.


Read more…

Why Gratitude is so Powerful for your Brain

Why is the simple practice of gratitude so helpful?

It is good for our brain and makes us more effective:

  1. Positive emotions fill our brain with dopamine and serotonin.  These chemicals make us feel good and increase our ability to learn.  They help us process new information, keep that information in the brain longer, and remember it faster later on.
  2. Feeling happy improves our ability to perform tasks and solve problems.
  3. We feel better when we think happy thoughts.  People who are grat…

Read more…