Love Notes

Hello,

Mirrors are a perfectionist’s enemy. We look at it and we critique ourselves. We see what is wrong. 

I went to retreat for eight days where one of my goals was to embrace my beauty as I age. What happened was, for eight days, I barely looked in the mirror while I was there, but the rest of the time my reflection was given to me through the other participants who reflected my beauty, who reflected how much they appreciated me, who reflected how awesome they thought I was. 

And I felt so…

Hello,

I like to share books that support my growth and/or rock my world.  And Bethany is another friend's work I want to share in honor of my birthday month.  In fact, today is my birthday.  I am 61!  Woohoo!

Here is what I read in Bethany Clemenson’s book Ditching the Dream:  How to Live Life on Your Terms that clinched my decision to share it with you:

“Societally, we aren’t taught to trust ourselves.  We are taught to conform and be logical and realistic.  

• Stand in line
• Learn the way…

Hello,

I think kindness is one of the most powerful forces in the universe.  It multiplies in magical ways.

I was recently telling a client about a study which found that the two biggest factors in client success in therapy are: 

• the therapist’s kindness toward themselves, and
• the therapist’s willingness to be wrong. 

At first, I was stunned by that—it wasn’t anything about clients that determined success, it was therapist’s kindness and openness (and I would wager, self-compassion) t…

I just had what could have been a very painful conversation with a good friend of mine.  It could have been, but it wasn’t.  At one point she stopped and said, “This is going a LOT better than I expected.”  I wholeheartedly, and with no small amount of relief, agreed.
I was pondering why it went so well.

It was a superstar of a conversation because of these elements we both contributed to our discussion. Read below for 7 tips to effectively resolve conflict.

 1. Do your best to avoid saying “yo…

Seattle Times recently wrote an article about the uptick in patients struggling with post-election anxiety. I was quoted with some helpful tips on how to keep our anxiety at bay. Here's the article:

Article Link

Hello,
Do you notice you are judging others a lot these days? Do you walk around criticizing the behaviors of others all the time?
How does it feel?
While we get an immediate rush of righteousness of being better than the other person, if we hold onto that feeling, it leads to feeling angry and frustrated. Not so helpful for our state of mind…
Watch this video to learn more about THE most effective way I’ve found to stop judging others. And BONUS, it will help you with your self-judgment too!

Love,…

If you have a critical voice in your head, constantly telling you how you screwed up, this practice is for you!

Kindness is good for you. If you want to know why, and get some ideas for small, kind, acts that help you feel better, watch this…

Kindness is powerful for others too. Here are 2 of my favorite videos about kindness. They make me cry and feel good about humanity, every time…

If you like this Love Note, share it with someone.

I would love to hear about small acts of kindness you do that make you feel good. You can reach me at hello@everydaylove.me

This past week was rugged for me.  I had a major disappointment and a part of myself I haven’t yet learned to completely love was alive and kicking.

I was reflecting on the dynamic that when we take actions to stretch our comfort zone, and it doesn’t work out as planned (or even when it does) we can get some pretty wicked backlash.

When we choose to love ourselves more, and allow more of our-self to come more alive, the old fears and lessons we learned WILL come up to be loved.

This is why se…

Hello,

One of the health practitioners I most trust to help my clients with their anxiety and depression is Kristen Allott, ND.

I have known Dr Allott, followed her work, and sent clients to her almost since I began my practice 15 years ago.  I regularly use her suggestions to help my clients change their eating to reduce their anxiety.

Now she and Natasha Duarte have written a book so they knowledge she gives to her clients is available to anyone!  Yay!

Fuel Your Brain, Not Your Anxiety:  S…